A letter arrived in the mail today from the Mount Laurel prosecutor's office regarding our case. The trial hasn't been set yet, but they did just say that they're here for us, to provide information and resources for victims and/or witnesses throughout the process. One of the things they offer assistance with is restitution, which is nice to know.
Attached to that friendly letter typed in ALL CAPS which was a little odd, there was a separate piece of paper we have the option to fill out and send in, on which we may document the objective and subjective effects being a victim of this crime has had on us. I can easily write down the value of the ring that person stole from me, and of the cool shoes, the muffin tin (I mean, really...a muffin tin?!) and various other low-cost items that are no longer in my possession, but when it comes to the statement part, I'm at a loss.
How do you write out that my primary emotional response in this situation is relief? That I am just so, so overhwhelmingly thankful that only stuff is missing. That I fully understand that the whole fault of this is my own? I guess there's no way to write that and still have a judge make that terrible excuse for a human give back the money she got from the cash for gold place, which hopefully maybe when combined with the pitiful payout from our insurance company might cover half the monetary value of my ring?
I don't feel that writing about losing my peace of mind is appropriate because clearly that was faulty peace. Or that I'm on high alert now at all times and still sometimes have a hard time leaving them at school all day, because clearly my guard was down and I left these children unprotected. There's not a lot to say on that little blue form. I'm the one who let her in, and I have to live with that. In my completely honest opinion, it's fair that I lost my ring given that it was my own failure at the only job I have in this life, and I should be (and oh how I am) glad that's all I lost.