Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Think of it as Preparation

So...the kids aren't sleeping and they are finding it necessary to share this state of being with me on a nightly basis. This is how it goes:

- We do our long and strictly formatted bedtime routine that is timed with near-military precision to have the lights OFF at no later than 8pm. If you know me at all you know what a challenge this is for me. Doing it every single night does not, in fact, make it easier.

- I turn on the dishwasher, turn off all the lights, switch the laundry and hop into my own bed with a book and hold my breath. (That's right; I'm in bed at 8:05. It's lovely!)

- Thumps upstairs....thump thump thump down the stairs...someone is in my room by 8:15 at the latest with a complaint of some physical ailment, the lights being too bright or too dim, the curtains being too open or closed or the paint being altogether the wrong shade of blue. True story. Said complainer is herded upstairs, usually crying, and I run downstairs and hop in my bed again.

- If I'm lucky, I get about 2.5 hours of peace. Someone crawls in my bed sometime between the first 30 seconds after I fall asleep and 11pm, whichever is most likely to interrupt my sleep cycle for the longest amount of time.

-The other one wakes up around 2am and comes downstairs crying, much more loudly than necessary, about being all alone in their room. If it's Bree, I make her a pallet and she goes to sleep. If it's Carly, I make her a pallet and she spends the next forty-five minutes whimpering and muttering about how if SHE were the mom she would be SO MUCH nicer than me. Refuses offers to take her grouchy butt back upstairs. Or to the couch. Or anywhere really. I just have to wait for her to finally pass out again.

- Baby wakes up and wants to be fed - IMMEDIATELY - at 3am. This is usually right as I'm about to fall back asleep....the last few nights I've been able to fake her out by drinking a lot of water, which is awesome but results in a 5am trip to the bathroom for me.

- Alarm goes off at 6am. I get to hear from Carly how TIRED she is. How it's not fair that she had to sleep on the floor, or if she made it into my bed first, how it's not fair that her bed isn't as comfortable as mine. Bree just wants me to "make some lunch for us" and Baby concurs.

-Then it's the morning! Yay!

I think some Paint program illustrations would make this much more hilarious, but it's been done already. Oh well - use your imaginations! It's not really all that bad, I guess. I mean, maybe uninterrupted sleep is totally overrated anyway. =)

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